How do you find sunshine through the rain?

Fake it until you make it!

I have heard people say this from time to time, but never did it ring so true for me as it has over the last few weeks

“If you have ever lost a loved one, then you know exactly how it feels. And if you have not, then you cannot possibly imagine it.”

A cloud has shadowed my life the last three weeks, and I have lost my focus and found it difficult to make sense of life.

My dear Dad passed away suddenly and my world stopped still.  I had to drop everything to travel back to the UK.

Mother died when my sister and I were very young so Dad has been our rock, raising us solo and being our tower of strength.

The trip was full of emotions, remembering happy times and feeling so sad to say goodbye.

Grief is such an unusual beast at first it mows you down like a skittle.  Then as you begin to pick yourself up back it comes like a tidal wave to take you down again!

In the past few weeks I found that my life has resembled a balloon. Once tethered securely by its string, its now cut free and hurtling at full speed into the unknown.

What was is no more but I know that I am strong enough and  that my Dad has provided me with all the tools I need to carry on. 

I just need to find the calm breeze to float upon, I know it’s out there.

It’s a times like this in life that we come to realize the importance of the unconditional love and strength we receive from our family and close friends. 

They are the ones that carry us through and give us the strength to move forward.

Now as I return to my life, I know that the pain will recede over time and I will be able to smile and be thankful for all the years I did have with Dad.

For now I am going to turn my attention back to my art and concentrate on trying to grow my business, channel the heartache and  endeavor to make my Dad proud.

I am determined to fake it, until I make it!

To those of you who have propped me up with your love and kind words – Thank you from the bottom of my heart! X

–  I love you! 

"Here comes the sun!"

“SHE WAS NO LONGER WRESTLING WITH THE GRIEF, BUT COULD SIT DOWN WITH IT AS A LASTING COMPANION AND MAKE IT A SHARER IN HER THOUGHTS”
~ George Elliot